With as many people out there looking for a job as there are, you would think that finding an aide for me would be an easy task. Let me be the first to tell you, it’s not.
The ads we place when searching for a new aide for me usually go something like this:
“In search of a woman between the ages of 23 and 45 to be an aide/personal assistant to a young lady with Brittle Bone Disease. Your responsibilities would be, but are not limited to, assistance with transfers from wheelchair to toilet and lying down position, help with hygienic activities, light house work, light cooking, and help with running a home business. You must be able to lift 50 pounds easily, you must be comfortable driving a minivan, and you must be reliable. Your boss will be completely dependent on you for her physical wellbeing, so not showing up for work is not an option and will result in immediate dismissal. Interest or experience in art is a plus. You absolutely must love dogs. No previous medical training required.”
I don’t put this in the ad, but I actually prefer people without any type of prior medical training for a couple of reasons. For one thing, I don’t handle my broken bones and chronic pain in the same way that most people do with traditional medications. It’s easier for me to start with someone who is a blank slate rather than having to retrain what they have known to be right their entire lives. I’ve also found that people with prior medical knowledge tend to over worry about hurting me. Now, granted, anyone moving me around has to be careful, but you also have to understand that I break sometimes when I sneeze or breathe wrong. I mean, it’s going to happen at some point no matter what, and that’s something all of my aides and friends moving me around need to understand. That’s just the reality of the situation. I have had hypochondriacs work for me in the past, and believe me, it does not make my life fun.
It’s also extremely important for both Mom and I to be able to trust the people we hire in our house and around our dogs. We need to trust that the person with me won’t steal from us or let out dogs out the front door or hurt them during the day. That’s a very big deal when you are hiring someone to work primarily in your home, and harder to find than you would think.
I’m lucky right now because I have two fabulous women working for me. One has been with me for over six years and the other has been with me for about a year and a half. Both were found by word of mouth, and one works Monday, Wednesday and Friday while the other works Tuesday and Thursday. They are complete polar opposites of each other personality-wise. One is SUPER left-brained, extremely organized, and keeps my house and life in nearly perfect working order. She does have a punctuality issue, but would pretty much bail me out of any tight situation I’d find myself in in a heartbeat. The other one is not particularly organized, but loves to cook, sew, and do creative projects with me. And she is ALWAYS on time, which is awesome. Both love my dogs and my dogs love them just the same. I’ve never actually had two aides working for me at the same time before, but the first one needed to cut her hours due to family obligations a little over a year ago and we needed to find someone else to fill in. Let me tell you, it’s the best of both worlds. Although completely different, both have great personalities and are inherently kind people (though I’d never want to be on either one of their bad sides). I’ve always felt like I can trust and depend on them both.
Although I can’t afford to pay my aides as much as I would like to, Mom and I try to take care of them in any way possible. We do pay as well as we can, and if they work extra hours doing an art show with me on a weekend and I do well, they often get a small bonus. There are other perks here and there, including significantly less expensive veterinary care for their animals through Mom’s office. They both love their pets to death, so that is a major plus for them. Although working for me is still a job and I do expect them to put forth a good bit of effort and always do their best, I try to keep the environment as laid back as possible. Because it is so hard for me to find people I like and actually do their job, I want to keep the good ones as long as I can!